How often do you smile during an average day? Honestly.
I’m not talking about a faux grin or little smirk but a legitimate felt-happiness-in-your-heart-and-mind smile.
If you’re like most people, you likely tend to go about your day with an almost blank expression on your face in a robotic-like manner. Even when interacting with others, people tend to go through the motions.
Hi. How are you?
Good. How about you?
Good.
Have a great day.
You, too.
Or how about automatically saying “you, too” in response to a question and then realizing you weren’t paying attention?
It’s easy to go through life as a routine. It’s safe. It’s comfortable. It also causes us to miss all the joy and splendor around us.
Smiling plays a big role in life and is a tremendously positive influence on well-being. In fact, the mere act of smiling can increase levels of hormones like dopamine and serotonin in the body. Dopamine increases our feelings of happiness. Serotonin release is associated with reduced stress. Low levels of serotonin are associated with depression and aggression. Smiling really can make people happier.
There is no better feeling than making someone smile, even yourself. It also helps make the world a warmer, friendlier place one interaction at a time.
One incredible way to help build a better world is through random acts of kindness, experiences others are not expecting during their daily robotic-like routine. Best of all, there are specific national and international days as well as a full week every year when the idea is celebrated and amplified: Random Acts of Kindness Day.
When did Random Acts of Kindness Day start?
A non-profit organization located in Denver, Colorado, created Random Acts of Kindness (RAK) Day in 1995. The founding members of the organization took note of the impact a simple act of kindness given to another had on the giver, the receiver, and any witness(es).
For example, Princess Diana’s dedication to those diagnosed and suffering with HIV and AIDS in the 1980s made news globally, taking the global focus off the Royal family’s distress and focusing it on her gentle, caring, presence.
Now we have a worldwide celebrated event.
Each year we have a Random Acts of Kindness Day (2/17/23), a RAK week (2/12-2/18/23), and a World RAK day (11/13/23). The RAK organization even has a calendar of events occurring across the year that subscribers, called RAKtivist, can interact with personally and virtually. Their goal is to #MakeKindnesstheNorm.
What is so important about being kind to others?
Giving, receiving, and witnessing RAK events can have a life-altering experience for you. Being kind increases your connection with others, which releases dopamine, a pleasure hormone. Social connection is one of the five proactive tools to keep depression away.
When you are kind, it inspires others to be kind and reminds you to repeat the behavior. And, just like that you’re becoming a RAKtivist, too!
The RAK organization website has collected responses from RAKtivists who reported positive life-changing impacts in their lives. There are also videos of experiences for the receivers and witnesses, too.
What are the benefits of being kind?
There are many positive effects that happen neurologically, physically, emotionally, and relationally when you start showing care and kindness for others.
Let’s start neurologically since your brain is the control center for the rest of what happens to you. One act of kindness per day can result in a happier brain because your brain is less stressed. The stress hormone, cortisol, drops by 23%, and our pleasure and cuddle hormones, dopamine and oxytocin, increase. Together it has been shown to decrease blood pressure and improve sleep.
Physically, acts of kindness support longer life and younger-looking skin, as well as feeling physically better overall. Your immune system is boosted, too. The RAK organization calls this the real fountain of youth! This youthfulness can give your emotional self a boost regarding esteem, empathy, compassion, and mood. You are less anxious and your loneliness drops because of your intentional social interactions, which is a key factor in lowering depression rates.
In combination, these positive effects of being kind have the potential to also improve your relationships.
When you feel better in all these ways, you will perceive and experience relationships in more positive ways as well. For example, research shows that children who give, receive, and/or witness random acts of kindness have better peer relationships and better academic standings.
What kinds of actions are considered random and kind?
A simple 3-step process is suggested by the RAK organization:
- Each day choose two ideas you are capable of doing that would engage someone else.
- Without the receiver knowing beforehand, do the act of kindness. That’s the random part.
- Share it on social media with the hashtag #KindnessExperience to support #MakingKindnesstheNorm.
A fun way to choose your two ideas each day is to set up a container with individually written ideas and just randomly pull two out each morning. The RAK organization website (site #1) has over 400 free ideas.
- Year-long calendars designed for the workplace, your home, and the children’s school environment that have an idea for each day of the year.
- Coloring pages for children…and adults…that show acts of kindness.
- Family games for playing at home that help teach and model kindness.
- Bookmarks to keep avid readers reminded to engage with others.
- Posters to decorate your home, school, or work environment so that you visually encourage and remind those around you.
- Posters are available for download, too, with inspirational quotes to keep you motivated each day.
- Award certificates are also available so you can randomly acknowledge others in their RAKtivist efforts, which is a RAK itself!
The Mayo Clinic also provides a month-long program that supports making kindness a norm in our society. Registration is free as well as online support, 100+ ideas, and participant engagement. Their goal is to help get you started on your way to healthier emotional well-being.
Is it ever too late to start?
Absolutely not.
Long-term psychological research on Adverse Childhood Experiences, more commonly known as childhood trauma has shown tons of support for the healing agents of care, kindness, and affirmation.
There are three specific actions that you can do to help jumpstart healing children of trauma.
- Affirm children as capable. Show them they matter to you, and that you believe in them.
- Include children in activities so that they feel cared about. Including = belonging = healing.
- Participate in community events or create peer events specifically for children. Children love play dates, sleepovers, backyard campouts, and cooking with their families.
The world can be a cruel, cold place. But it can just as easily be lit up and warmed. Everything depends on how each of us decides to go about our daily lives.
Through random acts of kindness, we can create a positive ripple effect that touches the lives of so many.
Will you follow your set, robotic routine?
Or will you break free and be the reason someone smiles today?
Just remember: Making one person smile might not change the world, but it could change the world for that one person.
